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Author Topic: Starting my new film script!  (Read 691 times)

CT_Sexybeast

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #20 on: August 01, 2016, 03:36:19 am »
Haha great job bringing up Danny's girl problems. I laughed pretty hard at that.

Diego Tutweiller

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #21 on: August 04, 2016, 02:53:02 pm »
Anger, Fear, and Disgust keep pressing buttons rapidly, but it is no use. In the back of Danny's mind, DC Island starts to crumble and shake, suddenly pulling away from the side of the cliff and dropping into the Pit of Snyder. The darkness has now consumed everything Danny loved as a child, hardening his heart and blinding him to the failings of Batman v Superman.

Deep in the Pit of Snyder, Joy and Superman watch as the island crashes to the floor of the pit. All around them is a ruined city-- dark, gritty, and covered in a thick layer of grey ash. Joy falls to the ground in tears.

Tatum: "It's all over. It's all lost. Snyder has destroyed everything... why? Why did he have to do this? All I ever wanted was for Danny to be happy."

Superman watches, not knowing what to do, as Joy picks up some ash from the ground and runs it through his fingers.

Tatum: "Do you remember... when he was still young? And he watched the original Superman movies for the first time? He spent so many years reading comic books and watching Justice League cartoons... I could listen to his stories all day. But that was before the neck-snapping, and letting the children die... and now this? What has Danny become? Has he forgotten what these characters were all about in the first place?"

Superman: "Joy, we need to try and get out of here."

Tatum: "Don't you see? This is all my fault! If I hadn't tried to make Danny happy with every movie he saw, no matter how bad it was, none of this would have ever happened!"

Superman: "I'm serious, Joy! We need to escape!"

Tatum: "Escape? You can't escape the Pit of Snyder! Once these characters have been ruined, that's it! It's over! It's all over..."

Superman: "Joy! Look out!"

Suddenly, a building behind Joy comes crashing down, revealing a towering monstrosity behind it. It is Zack Snyder, dressed all in black, with a stern, unfeeling look in his eyes. He pauses, then steps forward to try and crush Joy beneath his feet. Joy barely dodges him and starts to run. Snyder speaks, his voice deep and booming.

Snyder: "Everyone says that about Batman Begins. 'Batman's dark.' I'm like, 'Okay, no, Batman's cool.' He gets to go to a Tibetan monastery and be trained by ninjas. Okay? I want to do that. But he doesn't, like, get raped in prison. That could happen in my movie. If you want to talk about dark, that's how that would go."

Joy screams in terror.
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James Orenthal Cutler

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #22 on: August 04, 2016, 02:56:49 pm »
Anger, Fear, and Disgust keep pressing buttons rapidly, but it is no use. In the back of Danny's mind, DC Island starts to crumble and shake, suddenly pulling away from the side of the cliff and dropping into the Pit of Snyder. The darkness has now consumed everything Danny loved as a child, hardening his heart and blinding him to the failings of Batman v Superman.

Deep in the Pit of Snyder, Joy and Superman watch as the island crashes to the floor of the pit. All around them is a ruined city-- dark, gritty, and covered in a thick layer of grey ash. Joy falls to the ground in tears.

Tatum: "It's all over. It's all lost. Snyder has destroyed everything... why? Why did he have to do this? All I ever wanted was for Danny to be happy."

Superman watches, not knowing what to do, as Joy picks up some ash from the ground and runs it through his fingers.

Tatum: "Do you remember... when he was still young? And he watched the original Superman movies for the first time? He spent so many years reading comic books and watching Justice League cartoons... I could listen to his stories all day. But that was before the neck-snapping, and letting the children die... and now this? What has Danny become? Has he forgotten what these characters were all about in the first place?"

Superman: "Joy, we need to try and get out of here."

Tatum: "Don't you see? This is all my fault! If I hadn't tried to make Danny happy with every movie he saw, no matter how bad it was, none of this would have ever happened!"

Superman: "I'm serious, Joy! We need to escape!"

Tatum: "Escape? You can't escape the Pit of Snyder! Once these characters have been ruined, that's it! It's over! It's all over..."

Superman: "Joy! Look out!"

Suddenly, a building behind Joy comes crashing down, revealing a towering monstrosity behind it. It is Zack Snyder, dressed all in black, with a stern, unfeeling look in his eyes. He pauses, then steps forward to try and crush Joy beneath his feet. Joy barely dodges him and starts to run. Snyder speaks, his voice deep and booming.

Snyder: "Everyone says that about Batman Begins. 'Batman's dark.' I'm like, 'Okay, no, Batman's cool.' He gets to go to a Tibetan monastery and be trained by ninjas. Okay? I want to do that. But he doesn't, like, get raped in prison. That could happen in my movie. If you want to talk about dark, that's how that would go."

Joy screams in terror.

This was possibly sadder than the film version.  I kinda teared up here.  Not gonna lie.
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Diego Tutweiller

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #23 on: August 04, 2016, 03:07:02 pm »

This was possibly sadder than the film version.  I kinda teared up here.  Not gonna lie.


Caleb Paasche

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #24 on: August 04, 2016, 09:06:19 pm »
Just wanted to say that I'm about to re-watch Inside Out because of this.
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Diego Tutweiller

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #25 on: August 08, 2016, 09:52:50 pm »
Joy and Superman run through the hellscape that is the Pit of Snyder, dodging falling buildings and choking on falling ash. Looking down at his hands, Joy sees that they have started to turn a greyish-blue, losing their life and color as Snyder continues to poison them.

Tatum: "Superman! We have to get out of here right now!"

Superman: "WHEEEEREEE IS SHEE?!?!?! SAVE MARTHA!!!"

Tatum: "Superman, calm down! The power of Snyder is affecting you!"

Superman: "Oh... oh God. You're right, Joy. I don't know what came over me."

Tatum: "Geez, and we thought Brandon Routh was moody. Superman, you're our only hope! We have to escape! Fly us out!"

Superman: "I can't! Snyder is too powerful! Every time I try to take off, he sucks me back down! Unless..."

Tatum: "Unless what?"

Superman: "Nothing. Just take my hand. I'm getting you out of this."

Joy obliges, and Superman lifts off, both of them humming John Williams' Superman theme. The vast city of the Pit of Snyder spreads out below them, dark and foreboding, cluttered with identical buildings collapsing into rubble. As they hurtle towards the pinprick of light above, Superman starts to lose momentum fast, but he tries valiantly to press onward. As he reaches peak altitude, Superman heaves Joy in front of him and pushes with all his might. Joy flies up to the edge of the cliff and hangs on, while Superman falls back into the darkness.

Superman: "Yes! You did it, Joy! Superman saves the day again!"

Tatum: "But... but what about you?"

Superman: "I'll be fine! Go! Go save Danny! Take... take him to see Suicide Squad for me."

Superman smiles. As he finishes his sentence, his costume turns dark blue and he morphs into Henry Cavill. A gloom spreads through the Pit of Snyder, and buildings topple repeatedly upon the man of steel, trapping him forever. In the background, Zack Snyder's evil cackle is audible.
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Gold Jeffblum

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #26 on: August 08, 2016, 11:16:04 pm »
I came here to laugh... where are ah these feelings coming from?
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Diego Tutweiller

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #27 on: August 08, 2016, 11:43:26 pm »
I came here to laugh... where are ah these feelings coming from?

It's a darker, more realistic take on Danny Oh. Forget all your preconceived notions!

Diego Tutweiller

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #28 on: August 12, 2016, 04:11:14 am »
Joy runs along the edge of the Pit of Snyder looking for Sadness. In the distance, Superhero Island starts to shake and collapse. Joy screams in horror, then sees Sadness near the edge of the cliff.

Tatum: "Sadness! We need to get back to headquarters! What are you doing?"

Neville: "Joy? ... Never mind me. You go back on your own. You were right. Danny needs to be happy."

Tatum: "Sadness... what's wrong? What happened?"

Neville: "Suicide Squad's embargo was lifted while you were down in the pit. It's even worse than Batman v Superman. Danny will sink into total depression if I go back to headquarters. You need to be there for him, not me. All this time I thought that picking apart movies was the right thing to do... but I was wrong."

Tatum: "No! Sadness, you were right! Danny doesn't just need one of us-- he needs both of us! I understand now! You can't try to love every movie ever made, and you can't nitpick and analyze them to death either! It's the balance between the two that makes everyone's taste what it is. We're not plebeianous fanboy serfs or pretentious elitist snobs. We're all somewhere in between! Danny needs balance in his life, and we're the only ones who can do that for him."

Just then, Superhero Island falls into the Pit of Snyder, falling to pieces in the process. Only one island remains-- Movie Island. Joy looks at Sadness with determination.

Tatum: "You know what we have to do."

Neville: "Of course. I'm sorry I tried to ruin all of Danny's favorite films for you, Joy."

Tatum: "And I'm sorry I made Danny enjoy things I knew were terrible. But time is running out! Let's go before Danny loses his ability to love movies!"

The two start towards Movie Island. It holds steady for a moment, then slowly, gradually starts to tilt.
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Jim Raynor

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #29 on: October 28, 2016, 10:26:53 pm »
Bump, with recent events, it is needed to revive this parody script.

James Orenthal Cutler

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #30 on: October 28, 2016, 10:35:18 pm »
Bump, with recent events, it is needed to revive this parody script.

I'll complete it!

Jim Raynor: Bump, with recent events, it is needed to revive this parody script.

Diego: I'll hand the torch to Tatum.

Diego Tutweiller

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #31 on: December 13, 2016, 09:09:27 pm »
Movie Island continues to tilt as Joy and Sadness run toward it as fast as their legs can carry them. Reels of stacked film begin to fall off of it into the Pit of Snyder, and cracks begin to form in the enormous Academy Award that stands at its center. Joy screams.

Tatum: "We'll never get there in time!"

Neville: "Quite right. The critical failure of Suicide Squad will undoubtedly bring the last of the islands down for good. Our only hope now, I suppose, is that Danny maintains some level of mental stability. It's the only way the island will stay up."

Meanwhile, Danny Oh is posting on the Oasis. His eyes scan the screen for a moment, then he writes "Fuck you Diego. I'm not your Dommy 2.0. I'd frankly like to have a lot more worth in this community that I truly value. I'm sure that won't happen as long as I have a fondness for Snyder and pretty much all of his films except Sucker Punch, but whatever. I won't degrade myself and become another Trollfighters in-joke or meme, even for something that I personally am passionate about." With that, he slams the computer shut and walks away furiously.

Back in Danny's mind, Movie Island crumbles to dust and falls into the darkness.

Neville: "Well, so much for that."

Tatum: "I... I don't believe it. All hope is lost. There's no other way back to Danny's consciousness. He's gone completely numb."

Neville: "Really? There's no other way to break through to a teenage DC fanboy's mind?"

Joy thinks for a moment.

Tatum: "You know... I think I might have an idea..."
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Diego Tutweiller

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #32 on: December 14, 2016, 02:38:44 pm »
Joy and Sadness race through the maze of Danny's memory frantically. The clock is ticking.

Neville: "So Joy, what's this big idea that'll get us back to headquarters?"

Tatum: "You gave me it, Sadness! Just think-- if Superman disappeared, he must have been replaced by a different imaginary friend for Danny. And I think I know exactly who it must be!"

Neville: "I don't follow."

Tatum: "You said it yourself. Danny's a pubescent comic book fanboy! There's only one person who could have replaced Superman in his mind!"

Neville: "You mean..."

Just then, Joy and Sadness turn a corner and come face-to-face with an enormous clown. No... not a clown. It's Margot Robbie in her Harley Quinn costume! She looks down at the two emotions and smiles.

Margot Robbie: "Hey boys! ;D"

Neville: "Did she just speak an emoticon?"

Tatum: "No time! Quick! Climb up here!"

Joy and Sadness climb a pile of old memories, then take a running jump. They land on Harley Quinn's ass, bouncing hundreds of feet in the air, and then drop down right on top of headquarters. Joy cheers.

Tatum: "We did it, Sadness! We got home! I knew there was only one thing that could penetrate Danny's numbed, depressed mind-- booty. Let's go save him from committing suicide!"

Neville: "As much as I hate to admit it, you were right again. Joy, you really need to take over running Danny's brain. I can't handle this burden any longer."

Tatum: "No, Sadness, you still don't get it! Danny needs to be disappointed by Suicide Squad, or else he'll feel marginalized by society even more. He needs to be analytical! He needs to think! He needs... you."

Neville: "All right. By the power of thermodynamics... let's do this."

Sadness cracks his knuckles.
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CT_Sexybeast

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #33 on: December 14, 2016, 03:14:23 pm »
Harley Quinn speaking in emoticon is now one of my favorite parts of this story.
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Diego Tutweiller

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #34 on: December 14, 2016, 03:16:45 pm »
Harley Quinn speaking in emoticon is now one of my favorite parts of this story.

I should be studying for my poli sci and psychology finals tomorrow. Instead I'm writing a story about Channing Tatum using Margot Robbie's ass as a trampoline. I'm surprised I've made it this far in life.

Danny Darkoh

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #35 on: December 14, 2016, 04:22:43 pm »
I thought you were gonna incorporate Sarah lol.

James Orenthal Cutler

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Re: Starting my new film script!
« Reply #36 on: December 14, 2016, 04:27:08 pm »
I thought you were gonna incorporate Sarah lol.

Why would he rush one of the biggest plot points in which you finally come to terms with your gayness?

 

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