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Poll

Are y'all still gonna see this dumpster fire?

I'm seeing it opening night!
1 (25%)
I'll probably see it in theaters... eventually.
1 (25%)
I'll rent it on DVD. Disney has let me down thrice now.
1 (25%)
I'll pirate it. I refuse to give these corporate shills more of my money.
1 (25%)
I refuse to see this film.
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Total Members Voted: 3

Author Topic: Disney's™ Marvel's™ Han Solo™ Solo Standalone Film: A Star™ Wars™ Story  (Read 581 times)

Charles Longboat Jr.

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A review from state-owned "Russian Newspaper" gave it 4,5/5 stars because the writer saw true revolutionary parallels in it:

Han Solo also consists out of jokes, love, other eternal values, a space cthulthu, adrenaline-boosting chases on various vehicles and the revolutionary socialist ideas.

No, really, what did you expect? The Empire conducts wars of conquest (as illustrated with a brief travel to the hell on the frontlines) not just for any reason, but for money. Hence, someone must fund these wars. In particular, the accursed capitalists - the corporations who do not disdain either the mutually beneficial links with the criminal underworld, the brutal exploitation of workers, or the plain robbery of the people. 

The role of the voice of the proletariat, the flame-hearted Danko, the prophet of the revolution, is given to L3, the droid with the behaviours of a a boisterous black woman. She raises the miners' mutiny and then passes the spark of the revolutionary idea to Solo. In his turn, he essentially provides a massive push to the rebellious movement.

This leads us to an unexpected conclusion: if the rebels have any end goal, any plan for managing the galaxy after they depose the emperor's regime, it's quite possible that their goal is the institution of a socialist state. The Union of the Soviet Socialist Planets. A place where there's a parade on every 4th of May, on every Skywalker's Square next to the regional committee's building. A parade where Octembrists-Younglings march together, with profile of Comrade Luke on their lapel pins, and carry placards bearing words "The work of the droid L3 lives on and wins to this day!" What a beautiful picture. Even Ivan Ephremov would have shed a tear here.

That last paragraph is (perhaps deliberately) a lot of wishful thinking that doesn’t reflect much of the actual film’s ending. Of course, the writer is entitled to his or her opinion.

 

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