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Author Topic: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films  (Read 382 times)

Tut

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Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« on: May 28, 2016, 02:32:13 pm »
Previous.

In honor of X-Men: Apocalypse being released. Let's give Origins the Anus of Cinema rating it deserves! Also, I included Deadpool. It technically counts, I think.

X-Men: 64%
Though it's far above its superhero brethren thematically, X-Men's impact is often lessened by cheesy dialogue and dated CGI.

(11 votes)
Diego Tutweiller: +
John Tyler: +
Jim Raynor: -
Jeff Goldblum: -
Nick Moody: +
Danny Oh: +
Tanning Chatum: -
I Am The One Who Lurks (Shockwave): +
Caleb Paasche: -
Jay Cutler: +
Frank: +

X2: X-Men United: 91%
X-Men United improves upon its predecessor with strong social commentary, well-written characters, and a story that dares to take risks.

(11 votes)
Diego Tutweiller: -
John Tyler: +
Jim Raynor: +
Jeff Goldblum: +
Nick Moody: +
Danny Oh: +
Tanning Chatum: +
I Am The One Who Lurks (Shockwave): +
Caleb Paasche: +
Jay Cutler: +
Frank: +

X-Men: The Last Stand: 9%
After X-Men United, the franchise comes to a jarring halt with The Last Stand, a cluttered and silly superhero flick that lacks logic and character development.

(11 votes)
Diego Tutweiller: -
John Tyler: -
Jim Raynor: -
Jeff Goldblum: -
Nick Moody: -
Danny Oh: -
Tanning Chatum: -
I Am The One Who Lurks (Shockwave): -
Caleb Paasche: +
Jay Cutler: -
Frank: -

X-Men Origins: Wolverine: 20%
X-Men Origins: Wolverine is a shockingly bad mishandling of a story with great potential.

(10 votes)
Diego Tutweiller: -
John Tyler: -
Jim Raynor: -
Jeff Goldblum: -
Nick Moody: -
Danny Oh: -
Tanning Chatum: -
Caleb Paasche: -
Jay Cutler: +
Frank: +

X-Men: First Class: 73%
No.

(11 votes)
Diego Tutweiller: -
John Tyler: +
Jim Raynor: +
Jeff Goldblum: +
Nick Moody: +
Danny Oh: +
Tanning Chatum: +
I Am The One Who Lurks (Shockwave): +
Caleb Paasche: +
Jay Cutler: -
Frank: -

The Wolverine: 58%
It may not deliver as much thematically as previous outings in the franchise's history, but The Wolverine manages to be a fun, low-stakes action movie nonetheless.

(12 votes)
Diego Tutweiller: -
John Tyler: +
Jim Raynor: -
Jeff Goldblum: +
Nick Moody: +
Danny Oh: -
Tanning Chatum: +
Johnny Kashmir: +
I Am The One Who Lurks (Shockwave): +
Caleb Paasche: +
Jay Cutler: -
Frank: -

X-Men: Days of Future Past: 67%
Juggling hefty plotting and strong characters with virtuosity, Days of Future Past is one of the best X-Men films yet, if not one of the best superhero films in general.

(12 votes)
Diego Tutweiller: -
John Tyler: +
Jim Raynor: +
Jeff Goldblum: -
Nick Moody: +
Danny Oh: +
Tanning Chatum: +
Johnny Kashmir: +
I Am The One Who Lurks (Shockwave): +
Caleb Paasche: +
Jay Cutler: -
Frank: -

Deadpool: 90%
This movie is funny, I guess... if you've had a partial lobotomy sometime in the past six months.

(10 votes)
Diego Tutweiller: -
John Tyler: +
Jim Raynor: +
Jeff Goldblum: +
Nick Moody: +
Danny Oh: +
Tanning Chatum: +
I Am The One Who Lurks (Shockwave): +
Caleb Paasche: +
Frank: +

X-Men: Apocalypse: 80%
Deft, legitimate, and legitimately deft, Apocalypse is the best X-Men film ever made, with A-grade acting and honestly quite well-constructed themes of stuff, making the film, overall, great. No idea what John's been smoking.

(10 votes)
John Tyler: +
Jay Cutler: +
Jim Raynor: -
I Am The One Who Lurks (Shockwave): +
Tanning Chatum: +
Oh Danny Boy: +
Nick Moody: +
Diego Tutweiller: -
Caleb Paasche: +
Frank: +

Logan: 80%

Diego Tutweiller: -
John Tyler: +
Nick Moody: +
Frank: +
Channing Tartar: +

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cupcake

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #1 on: May 28, 2016, 02:34:24 pm »
 
Let's give Origins the Anus of Cinema rating it deserves!


X-Men Origins:

+
goodbye!

Flounder Prefers Browntown

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #2 on: May 28, 2016, 02:37:30 pm »
X-Men: +
X2: +
The Last Stand: -
Origins: -
First Class: +
The Wolverine: +
Days of Future Past: +
Deadpool: +
Everything is terrible.

Jim Raynor Remastered

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #3 on: May 28, 2016, 02:41:23 pm »
X-Men: -
X-Men 2: +
The Last Stand: -
Origins: -
The Wolverine: -
First Class: +
Days of Future Past: +
Deadpool: +
Apocalypse: -

cupcake

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goodbye!

Gold Jeffblum

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #5 on: May 28, 2016, 02:51:04 pm »
1 -
2 +
3 -
4 -
5 +
6 +
7 -
Deadpool +

cupcake

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #6 on: May 28, 2016, 02:53:55 pm »
First one to guess which one of these animals isn't real gets an exclusive first look at my next movie poster.





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Tut

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #7 on: May 28, 2016, 02:55:55 pm »
The lizard thing.

cupcake

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #8 on: May 28, 2016, 02:57:05 pm »
The lizard thing.

Oooo... nice guess but unfortunately wrong.
goodbye!

Flounder Prefers Browntown

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Everything is terrible.

Tut

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #10 on: May 28, 2016, 02:58:27 pm »
The lizard thing.

Oooo... nice guess but unfortunately wrong.

All you said was that I had to guess. You said nothing about guessing correctly.

Flounder Prefers Browntown

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #11 on: May 28, 2016, 02:58:36 pm »
What is the shark horse.
Everything is terrible.

Gold Jeffblum

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #12 on: May 28, 2016, 03:02:01 pm »
7 -
Snowblowers.
I remember Richard Nixon being in it and ah me calling it a T2 ripoff for some reason. Other than that, it has ah... completely evaporated from my brain.

cupcake

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #13 on: May 28, 2016, 03:02:54 pm »
What is the shark horse.

Your solution is elegant, though ultimately correct.
goodbye!

Crohn's Boy

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #14 on: May 28, 2016, 03:03:17 pm »
X-Men: +
X2: +
X3: -
Origins: -
First Class: +
Wolverine: +
DoFP: +
Deadpool: +
Goodbye!

$+/\|_|\|

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #15 on: May 28, 2016, 03:12:31 pm »
X-Men: +
X2: +
X3: United: -
Origins: -
First Class: +
The Wolverine: -
DoFP: +
Deadpool: +

Tut

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PORG

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #17 on: May 28, 2016, 04:08:44 pm »
X-Men: -
X-2: +
The Last Stand: -
Origins: -
The Wolverine: +
First Class: +
Days of Future Paaaasche: +
Deadpool: +

Charles Longboat Jr.

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #18 on: May 28, 2016, 04:43:18 pm »
The Wolverine and Days of Future Past get a +. I have not seen any of the others.

The One Who Lurks

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Re: Consensus XV: The X-Men Films
« Reply #19 on: May 29, 2016, 01:51:46 am »
+ for all of them (including Apocalypse), except Last Stand, which gets a -

and nothing for Origins, because I haven't seen that one.

 

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