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Author Topic: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys  (Read 276 times)

Charles Longboat Jr.

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Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« on: January 25, 2018, 10:58:22 pm »
Previous

Going to go with widely lambasted films and a few polarizing (while not necessarily being critically slaughtered) bombs from 2017. Requests welcome.

The Circle:
Charles Longboat Jr.: - (1/10)
John Tyler: - (3/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (1/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (1/10)
The Moody Blues: - (5/10)

Kong: Skull Island: 64%
Consensus: Kong: Skull Island may be light on character and plot but its playful tone and impressive visuals allow for a reasonably diverting monster movie. (11 votes)
Charles Longboat Jr: - (5/10)
Young Darkoh: +
ChillinDylan Godsend: + (7.5/10)
Cutler: - (0/10)
Kale Pasta: + (6.5/10)
The Moody Blues: + (7.5/10)
John Tyler: + (9/10)
Jim Raynor: - (5/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (0/10)
Frank: + (6.5/10)
The Tall Man: + (7/10)

The Emoji Movie:
John Tyler: - (0/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (1/10)
The Moody Blues: - (0/10)
Cutler: - (2/10)

Alien (2017) ft. Jake Gyllenhaal: 17%
Cutler: - (3/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (4.5/10)
John Tyler: + (8/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (3/10)
The Moody Blues: - (4.5/10)
Frank: - (3/10)

Prometheus 2-ish: 22%
Consensus: Not even Michael Fassbender can save Alien: Covenant, whose identity crisis between being a sequel to Prometheus, a rumination on AI in the vein of Blade Runner, and a slasher dooms it to being a wildly inconsistent work that throws the franchise's mythology out of the window and doubles down on its predecessor's flaws.
Charles Longboat Jr.: - (4.5/10)
Cutler: - (3/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (5/10)
John Tyler: + (6/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (3/10)
The Moody Blues: + (8/10)
Jim Raynor: - (4/10)
Frank: - (4/10)
The Tall Man: - (5.5/10)

The Mummy:
John Tyler: - (2/10)
Cutler: - (5/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (2/10)
The Moody Blues: - (4/10)

Transformers: The Last Knight: 0%
John Tyler: - (1/10)
Kale Pasta: - (3/10)
Cutler: - (3/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (1/10)
Jim Raynor: - (1.5/10)
The Moody Blues: - (2/10)

Geostorm:
John Tyler: - (2/10)
Kale Pasta: - (2/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (4/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (4/10)
The Moody Blues: + (8/10)

The Bye Bye Man:
John Tyler: - (0/10)
Frank: - (2/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (3/10)
The Moody Blues: - (2/10)

The Snowman:
John Tyler: - (5/10 by virtue of fascination)
The Moody Blues: - (2.5/10)

The Book of Henry:
John Tyler: - (5/10; see The Snowman)
Diego Tutweiller: - (1/10)
The Moody Blues: - (5/10; see John's rating)

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets: 57%
Consensus: Luc Besson's passion project shines on a purely visual level, though its woefully miscast leading pair and a messy script make prevent it from reaching the potential that its promising source material suggests.
Charles Longboat Jr.: - (5.5/10)
John Tyler: + (7/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: + (7/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (3/10)
The Moody Blues: + (9/10)
The Tall Man: - (3/10)
Frank: + (6/10)

Ghost in the Shell, starring some honky:
John Tyler: + (8/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (5/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (3/10)
The Moody Blues: + (6.5/10)

A Cure for Wellness:
John Tyler: + (8/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (As he has forgotten about the film?)
Diego Tutweiller: - (5/10)
The Moody Blues: + (10/10)

The Academy Award nominee The Boss Baby:
John Tyler: - (3/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (1/10)
The Moody Blues: + (6/10)
Jim Raynor: - (3/10)

Justice League: 33%
John Tyler: + (6/10)
Kale Pasta: + (6/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (1.5/10)
Diego Tutweiller: - (3/10)
The Moody Blues: - (1.5/10)
Jim Raynor: - (2/10)
Frank: - (3/10)

Rough Night:
John Tyler: + (6/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (0/10)
The Moody Blues: + (6.5/10)

Rings:
John Tyler: - (0/10)
ChillinDylan Godsend: - (1.5/10)
Frank: - (1/10)
The Moody Blues: - (0/10)

mother!: 100%
John Tyler: + (10/10)
Kale Pasta: + (8/10)
Diego Tutweiller: + (8/10)
The Moody Blues: + (10/10)
Frank: (7/10)

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Kale Pasta

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #1 on: January 25, 2018, 11:00:52 pm »
Geostorm: 2/10
Transformers: The Last Knight: 3/10
mother!: 8/10 (the Razzie noms for this movie are such a joke).

Flounder Prefers Browntown

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #2 on: January 25, 2018, 11:05:00 pm »
The Circle: - (3/10)
The Emoji Movie: - (0/10)
The Mummy: - (2/10)
Bayformer5: - (1/10)
Geostorm: - (2/10)
The Bye Bye Man: - (0/10)
The Snowman: - (5/10)*
The Book of Henry: - (5/10)*
Valerian: + (7/10)
Ghost in the Shell: + (8/10)
A Cure for Wellness: + (8/10)
mother!: + (10/10)

*I recognize that The Snowman and The Book of Henry are bad but they're so fascinating in their badness that I just can't really bring myself to hate them.
Everything is terrible.

ChillinDylan Godsend

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #3 on: January 25, 2018, 11:08:09 pm »
Previous

Going to go with widely lambasted films and a few polarizing (while not necessarily being critically slaughtered) bombs from 2017. Requests welcome.

The Circle:

The Emoji Movie:

The Mummy:

Transformers: The Last Knight:

Geostorm:

The Bye Bye Man:

The Snowman:

The Book of Henry:

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets:

Ghost in the Shell, starring some honky:

A Cure for Wellness:

mother!:

Could you add:  Justice League, Rings, Rough Night, and Boss Baby?

Flounder Prefers Browntown

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #4 on: January 25, 2018, 11:10:22 pm »
Could you add:  Justice League, Rings, Rough Night, and Oscar Nominated Boss Baby?
I'm pretty sure you, Moody, and I are the only ones on this forum who've seen Rings and Rough Night.
Everything is terrible.

Tut

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #5 on: January 25, 2018, 11:11:19 pm »
Kashmir, have you not seen any of these?

ChillinDylan Godsend

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #6 on: January 25, 2018, 11:12:36 pm »
Could you add:  Justice League, Rings, Rough Night, and Boss Baby?
I'm pretty sure you, Moody, and I are the only ones on this forum who've seen Rings and Rough Night.

I know Frank saw Rings - we saw it together.

cupcake

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #7 on: January 25, 2018, 11:13:16 pm »
Could you add:  Justice League, Rings, Rough Night, and Boss Baby?
I'm pretty sure you, Moody, and I are the only ones on this forum who've seen Rings and Rough Night.

I know Frank saw Rings - we saw it together.

sus...
goodbye!

Flounder Prefers Browntown

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #8 on: January 25, 2018, 11:13:39 pm »
Could you add:  Justice League, Rings, Rough Night, and Boss Baby?
I'm pretty sure you, Moody, and I are the only ones on this forum who've seen Rings and Rough Night.

I know Frank saw Rings - we saw it together.
Ah.
Everything is terrible.

ChillinDylan Godsend

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #9 on: January 25, 2018, 11:16:31 pm »
The Circle:  1/10
Geostorm:  4/10
Bye Bye Man:  3/10
Valerian and City of a Thousand Planets:  7/10
Ghost in the Shell:  3/10
A Cure for Wellness:  forgot to document & can't remember/10

Boss Baby:  1/10
Rough Night:  0/10
Rings:  1.5/10
Justice League:  1.5/10

Flounder Prefers Browntown

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #10 on: January 25, 2018, 11:19:34 pm »
The Boss Baby: - (3/10)
Rough Night: + (6/10)
Rings: - (0/10)
Justice League: + (6/10)
Everything is terrible.

Charles Longboat Jr.

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #11 on: January 25, 2018, 11:34:49 pm »

Could you add:  Justice League, Rings, Rough Night, and Boss Baby?
Added alongside Life (that Alien ripoff from March) and Alien Covenant.

Charles Longboat Jr.

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #12 on: January 25, 2018, 11:36:13 pm »
Kashmir, have you not seen any of these?
I've seen a couple but I didn't have time to log in the scores yet.

cupcake

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #13 on: January 25, 2018, 11:37:00 pm »
Alien: 3/10
Mummy: 5/10
Transformers: 3/10
Life: 3/10
Academy Award Nominee The Boss Baby: 10/10
goodbye!

Kale Pasta

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #14 on: January 25, 2018, 11:37:43 pm »
If Justice League is being added then I'll add my 6/10 for that one.

ChillinDylan Godsend

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #15 on: January 25, 2018, 11:38:33 pm »

Could you add:  Justice League, Rings, Rough Night, and Boss Baby?
Added alongside Life (that Alien ripoff from March) and Alien Covenant.

Life:  4.5/10
Alien Covenant:  5/10

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #16 on: January 25, 2018, 11:39:52 pm »
Life: + (8/10)
Alien: Covenant: + (6/10)
Everything is terrible.

Tut

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #17 on: January 25, 2018, 11:53:49 pm »
Spoiler (hover to show)

Y'all Valerian lovers are going straight to hell.

ChillinDylan Godsend

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #18 on: January 25, 2018, 11:56:06 pm »
Spoiler (hover to show)

Y'all Valerian lovers are going straight to hell.

Hahaha - I think Frank liked it as well - of course we were trashed when we watched it, but still...

Charles Longboat Jr.

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Re: Consensus XXXVI: 2017 Cinematic Turkeys
« Reply #19 on: January 26, 2018, 12:05:43 am »
Added Kong: Skull Island since it'd make for a fun consensus (although it's not technically a critical or financial turkey so to speak).

 

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